Adventures in the Land of Smiles: Round 1

Thailand is called the "Land of Smiles". For good reason too. The people are friendly and always seem to have a smile on their face. And I just can't seem but help but smile either!.There's just so much to smile about here!

I've been in Thailand for a week now. And I've fallen in love with the place. I've traveled up north, in the middle, and now down south. I've only gotten to see a bit of the country so far but it has been great. I've seen the big cities, small villages, and now the coastline. It is a color land filled with beautiful people.

Chiang Rai (northern Thailand)

Northern Thailand




Currently I am about 4 hours south of Bangkok along the coast (RIGHT along the coast. Like 100 yards from the beach). Needless to say, I am thoroughly enjoying the warm weather. It is hot and humid and I am loving it. So nice to see the ocean again!
I am SUPER busy with work this week, but I'm finding time to have fun too. Tonight some friends and I went night swimming in the sea. It was so fun! It was very dark and you could see tons of stars glittering in the sky. The water was full of glow-in-the-dark algae. The sky above us twinkled with heavenly lights and the water around us glowed with earthly sparkles. It was stunning. Then we sat one the beach and sang songs together to our Father.


I had my "Aha!" moment of realization today. It tends to take me awhile to process things. And then suddenly it all comes together in a moment and I get it. My realization of me moving to China took place about 3 week after I had been there. I was standing in a park surrounded by old Chinese people flying kites, and suddenly looked around and saw it and shouted "Oh my gosh! I'm in China!!!!"
It only took me a week this time for me to grasp the reality that I am in Thailand. I was on the back of a motorbike riding through a little fishing village and then all of a sudden a burst out laughing and realized "OH MY GOODNESS! I AM IN THAILAND!". There is just something about those moments that triggers my understanding of the reality of my surroundings and the reality of where I am, what's happened, and what is happening.

I just LOVE Thailand :-)

THAILAND! OH MY GOLLY!

I am in Thailand right now.

*Excuse me as I have a moment of freaking out and trying to comprehend that I am actually here*

I have wanted to come to Thailand for as long as I can remember. It is the biggest dream I have ever had. It's been the one thing I have wanted the most. Coming to Thailand is literally a dream come true for me - a dream that at many times I was afraid to dream, a dream that was on the other side of the world for me, a dream that I thought maybe was just not realistic. But my dream as become reality. And I am so happy to be here. It doesn't feel like a dream. It feels so real. Almost inevitably true.

The plane from Kunming, China started to descend. As we broke through the clouds I got my first sight of Thailand. My eyes filled with tears and my face wore one of the fullest smiles it had ever held. I couldn't believe it. After so many years, I was here! I got off the plane and had to try extremely hard not to skip the whole way through the airport to Thai immigration.
All those books I read, all the money I saved from that job in high school, all those photos on my bedroom wall, it all came together and took solid form. Thailand was under my feet. It felt strangely familiar. Though it is a completely foreign place to me, I felt like I have always been here. I felt like I had come home.

Two weeks ago I was nervous to come. "What if it's not like I have imagined? What if I don't like it? What if it doesn't like me? What if? What if? What if?" Suddenly my dream was coming true and I was overwhelmed. Maybe it's safer, maybe it's better in dream form, I wondered. Maybe I should keep it as a wish in a box in the back of my closet. But no. I knew that would never do. I couldn't live without coming here. Without smelling the air, and feeling the red soil beneath my toes. I had to see the kids' faces with my own eyes. I had to hear them laugh. I had to come. I don't know what pulls me to Thailand. I'm not sure how a string got tied from my heart to this country, but here I am!

I can't remember what I imagined it would be like. I can't remember what I thought it would be, because all I can see is what it is really. All I can do is smell the wet air and thank our Father for making my dream, the dream He put in me, come true.

Living your dream is quite demanding though, so I'm going to go grab some insanely delicious Thai food to fill my hungry stomach.

And I will post soon again on what I have seen and experienced to so far! I have only been here 2 days but already have seen things that have made laugh so hard, and things that have made me weep brokenheartedly.

It is such a beautiful place.

I see why the call it the "Land of Smiles" :)



P.S. Big Plus: It's no where near as cold as where I have been living these past few months! First thing I did when we landed: pulled out my flipflops from my suitcase :) It's so nice to not have to wear more than one pair of pants.

Photos from Home #1 for this year

Flying in...

Just chilling in the park playing music...

Central Square

Phase 1: Complete

Tonight is my last night in this city.

When I first arrived here I felt like I had landed on another planet or traveled to another world. I began to understand what it really means to be a waiguoren (foreigner). Nothing looked familiar. Nothing felt familiar. Nothing was familiar. Living here was my first introduction to this country. At first I wasn't quite sure if I liked this city. It definitely took some readjusting and a bit of time to sort through culture shock. But I have come to love this place. With all its quirks and unique little things. I love the parks everywhere. I love the old men who carry around their bird cages. I love the hilarious attempts at translating signs into English (The sign outside one store I shop at reads "Uno Meal Feed Line". I still haven't figured out what it's supposed to say.) I love how all the trees in the city light up at night. I love how the whole city lights up at night! I love that my bathroom makes me laugh every time I go in to it. There's a hole in the floor for the pipes to come up. You have to put your hand down the tank of the toilet to flush it. If you lean on the sink it will fall over. The shower head is duct-taped to the wall. And there a piece of paper taped over a big hole in the middle of the door. (but most important, there is hot water! which I am grateful for every day) I seriously chuckle almost every time I enter the bathroom. I love the diversity of the city. I love all the different demographics. I love mian pian (a type of noodles that this region is known for).
There are many things I did not enjoy - like being constantly stared and pointed at, yak meat, and the freezing cold. But even those things fade in comparison to all the great things about this place and these people. Sometimes I just tell myself that they are staring and pointing because they think I'm so beautiful and that it's not really because they think I'm a weird white foreigner (which is indeed the real reason). The cold has taken the most getting used to. It is about 12 degrees Fahrenheit outside right now (-11), and tonight is a "warm" night. Let's just say I will be one happy girl when I arrive in Thailand on Thursday. I greatly look forward to not having to wear multiple pairs of pants and socks.
I have thoroughly enjoyed living here. It's been an adventure. I will miss it.
Now on to the next adventure: Thailand!

Dying to Live

You think I would have known better than to ask "Father, help me to surrender more of myself to You. Show me what I am holding back." In truth, I did know what it would mean if He granted my request. Although I honestly had no idea what I was asking. But I had to ask. I was compelled to want this, even though I knew I was basically asking Him to make things harder, to take control over some of my favorite things to control, and to put me in a very uncomfortable, painful, and difficult process. I'd been down this "surrendering" road before, and I knew I was not asking Him to join me on a stroll through the park. But like I said, I had to ask. Once you've tasted the finer things of life, it's hard to go back to what you knew before even if there is a higher price to be paid for those fine things. And that's why I asked. Because I had tasted, and I had seen, and I had known that He is good. I had known that He is best. I was dying to live more of the Life He gives. "What am I holding back?" I repeated.
He wasted no time in answering my question.
I won't go into details. I'm not brave enough for that yet. But let's just say that He showed me something I never placed under the "Learn to Surrender At Some Point" category. In fact, I had probably placed it under the "No Need to Surrender, You're Allowed to Keep This One" title. It never occurred to me that He might ask me to give up this thing. I saw it as my right to have it. In fact, it is my right. But that's exactly what He was asking, "Give up your rights, Emily. The rights you deserve. The rights you have the right to." Now, of course, you are probably thinking. Of course to follow Him you have to give up your rights. You know that. I knew that. Anyone who's ever been to Sunday school knows that. But it's a whole different ball game when He looks at you, points to it, and says "OK, hand it over." I looked back at Him flabbergasted. "But..but, that one is mine..." I stammered. I couldn't bring myself to look Him in the eye but I could feel His penetrating gaze upon me no matter where I looked or what I tried to change the subject to.
Ever since I was little it was obvious that fairness and justice are some of my key values. As a kid I dreamed of winning a Noble Peace Prize because of the outstanding contributions I made to fighting for human rights for people and women around the world. I used to practice my acceptance speech in the bathroom mirror. I currently dream of fighting human trafficking. Here I was, a human rights activist down to my very core, and He was asking me to give up my human rights. My right to want and to seek a reasonable life. My rights to feel emotions and respond in ways that are warranted according to the situation. But He doesn't operate in our kind of reasonableness, does He? He is not really concerned about what we sanction to be warranted, is He? My right to a reasonable life, to a life that makes sense, was what I was holding back. "My sense isn't your sense." He said. Indeed this was no stroll through the park. I felt like He was asking me to join Him on hike up Mt. Everest's big brother when I was aiming for something a little more down to earth. But there was no going back. Once I got over my shock, once I got over being offended, I said "OK." I was still unable to look Him in the eye, but I stammered, "OK, You can have it." I knew I had to die to myself, release my ideals, and let go of my "rights" in order to make it up that mountain. You see, I got into this whole thing in the first place because I was dying to live, but He taught me that I had to die so that I may live. Literally dying to live. But to live indeed! Life on top of the mountain really is the best, even if you had to dump your favorite things out of your backpack along the way to lighten your load.
Tonight I was talking to a friend of mine who has been at this whole living life thing some years longer than I. She said if she were to sum up her whole life in one word it would be "Give-up". After all these years, she said giving-up, letting go, surrendering is the lesson she keeps taking away from her journey towards Life.
The American, the 21st century woman, and the human rights activist within me is appalled. But I can't be a good citizen if I don't follow what is truly Good, can I? I can't be a powerful, thriving woman if I don't tap into who I was really created to be, can I? And I can't effectively stand up and fight to protect the rights we have as humans until I first understand what it means to follow the One who gave us the right to be called children of God.
I'm still not even half way up the mountain's slope, but there's just no going back now. I must have more of Him. I must give Him more of me. I am dying to live, to truly LIVE.